So I was watching this special on the fattest man alive...

My question is how do you get to the point where you are too fat to get out of bed?  One night you go to sleep and the next day you wake up like ahh... I think ill just stay in bed for the next 5 years!

sometimes it pays to shop for other insurance... its my job to try to retain a customer when they want to cancel their policy.. sometimes that is very difficult... I had a guy today who was saving $1500 a year by switching.. what can i say to get him to say?  Yes sir, I understand thats a lot of money but, we have 24 hour customer service!

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In 7th grade I called my english teacher  "Gay" and got sent home from school for the day.  

When I got home my Dad was waiting for me.. He just started going crazy yelling at me about calling people Gay and he told me I didn't know what Gay was.  

I remember him yelling, "I'LL SHOW YOU WHAT A FAGGOT IS!!!!!!!"

he showed me...........  We went shopping for 9 and 1/2 hours.